If you are the "powerful" one, odds are you feel more confident and are generally more happy about the relationship than the person who is less powerful; if you're less powerful, then you probably feel more insecure and uncomfortable than the powerful person, and are not as happy.
I know for myself, when I feel like I am the dominant one in the relationship, it makes me feel more confident in myself because I feel like I have control over the other person, or in some cases, people. This confidence can really vary: it can be a mental, emotional, social, ect. I feel a lot better about myself, and I feel like I can truly BE MYSELF. This includes being goofy, hyper, sad, loud, funny, and so on.
On the other hand, if I am with people that I do not know very well or I feel insecure around, I do not feel comfortable in my own skin and surroundings. I tend to be much quieter and give my input less frequently. I tend to be more reserved in my conversation, gestures, and so on. It is uncomfortable.
I think a lot of the times these situations occur are situational, depending on who I am with and where I am.
For example, if I go to a party and I know a lot of people and everyone else might not know as many people, I tend to be more myself because I am comfortable in my surroundings; However, if I am somewhere where I know no one, I tend to be more reserved, especially if I am insecure about my looks in comparison.
However, I am a very independent person when it comes to how much "power" I will allow for someone to have over me. My mom has ALWAYS taught me not to be with someone who is controlling because that is the relationship she has with my stepdad and she hates it. I think if I would be able to be with someone who didn't let me do what I wanted to do.
I think that power and trust are definitely intertwined. I think that obviously there are people who are just controlling/passive and there are people who are just too trusting/not trusting enough, but I think for many people they don't trust, so they're controlling.
However, I am a very independent person when it comes to how much "power" I will allow for someone to have over me. My mom has ALWAYS taught me not to be with someone who is controlling because that is the relationship she has with my stepdad and she hates it. I think if I would be able to be with someone who didn't let me do what I wanted to do.
I think that power and trust are definitely intertwined. I think that obviously there are people who are just controlling/passive and there are people who are just too trusting/not trusting enough, but I think for many people they don't trust, so they're controlling.
Ginger,
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with comments you had about the power concept for conflict. If a person has a lot of power they feel more confident going into the situation. Take for example; going into an environment where the surroundings are accustomed to one's liken, it makes a person have great confidence. Same goes if you are not comfortable with the situation then you feel timid around situations that the surroundings are not to your liken. I also agree with how your mom raised you; my mom taught me not to be controlling or be with someone who is controlling because it would ruin a relationship. I really enjoyed your post hope everything with your mom and step dad goes well.